flamingprick | Nope's Peak r2

Yeah, it was. Because there's like thirty people in there and it feels weird to do anything when they're watching.

[Even that first bite was probably more than they should have done. Rin is odd in that he will greedily soak up affection of any kind, but is a bit particular about what's okay and not okay in front of other people.

Now that the door's shut and locked too he's right over by the bed, kicking off his shoes.]

You know, it's really unfair. You know my weaknesses, but I don't know any of yours. Are you gonna share, or do I have to find them out on my own?

Well. Not everyone can be so open with their weaknesses, Rin.

[which is to say, lol like he would ever make this easy?]

I guess I'll have to find them out myself then!

[Allen you're really only making this difficult for yourself. Rin is nothing if not eager.

Speaking of which as soon as his shoes are off he's going to climb onto the bed. Though once his knees are on it and he raises an arm to start to climb over Allen he stops and hesitates.]

...this is okay, right? I mean, if it's not we don't have to-

[He did kind of grab Allen very quickly back there and all. He'll stop if Allen wants to.]

[if anything could actually get Allen to relax a little, it's actually checking after his welfare. it's true this was all very sudden and he wasn't sure what he was going to do, but the fact that Rin does pause, does check with him, has what tension might have been in him to bleed out.

but then he recalls what Akira and he talked about and just. kind of. smiles. it's not the best kind of smiles, but it's not a bad one, either.]

There's... maybe a couple of things to discuss before anything happens, if you're willing to wait a bit.

I just don't want you to be making any decisions before knowing them, is all.

[He sees that smile and decides that yes, it's a good idea to stop and talk. Because it sounds like something is on Allen's mind, and while it probably won't end up changing Rin's opinion about anything he would rather put Allen's worries to rest.

So he sits back on his knees, giving Allen plenty of room to sit up.]

Sure, what's on your mind?

[he actually doesn't sit up, but he does lift up his hands so he can pull off his gloves, reveal normal human and abnormal Innocence hands.]

Mostly... I hope you know Akira was very blunt in explaining you having feelings for me.

[so getting that out of the way, first.]

[Rin goes quiet for a second, and then:]

That prick! I told him to see if you were interested too, not to confess FOR me!

[At least he's not a coward? But yeah he totally did ask Akira to see if Allen liked him or not. Rin's insecure about liking people after the disaster that is his canon love life, and he didn't want to push it if Allen wasn't interested.]

He probably would have given you the report of what he was able to glean from that conversation but...

[well... this happened.

and actually, Allen has a sudden bout of shame as he realizes he was pushing Rin's buttons without addressing this whole thing. so he looks away for a long moment.]

Anyway. It's... not that I'm not interested--obviously, I haven't been very good at not showing that. With you and Miss Sonia...

[you can practically hear the "but"]

['This happened' indeed. Rin had actually planned on waiting until he heard back from Akira before talking with Allen about it, but when Allen and Sonia had approached him in the prop room yesterday everything just. Went from there.

Truthfully Rin is happy with the result anyway. He makes a mental note to apologize for asking Akira for help when the problem solved itself anyway.]

Yeah, you're really obvious, you know that? It's nice to not be the only obvious one here.

[He can hear that 'but' at the end though.]

Is this about what we talked about before? The Noah-thing?

[a little. disgruntled. at being called obvious. he has an excellent poker face, tyvm. but also like... not wrong.]

... mm, the Noah thing is part of it.

[and he kind of. tries to steel himself because he hasn't really talked to someone fully about the situation--even with Akira, he left the Noah thing completely off the explanation.]

It's just... I don't want to hurt anyone. But that's impossible because... one way or another... this place is temporary. And I'm not meant to live for very long.

[You know, having a dead dad is helping here, because it's taught him a lot about death and loss in the last year or so.

Rin's voice is very gentle when he speaks.]

If you're not meant to live for long, then that's all the more reason to live well, isn't it?

["The brightest flames burn out the fastest, but they look the most beautiful." Or something like that.]

Look, if this is about your limited time, it's fine. Even if you didn't have that Noah stuff going on and lived a 100% normal life, I was always gonna outlive you. Half-demon, remember?

[He's not entirely sure how much extra time half-demons get, but he does know that demons can live for centuries and centuries, so there must be some extra time tacked on there somewhere.]

And yeah, that's a little sad to think about. But I'm not gonna bury you until you're dead and gone, alright? I was serious about making this time count. Even if it's just one more day, I'd rather spend it having fun and smiling with you.

[he didn't actually know that was a thing for half-demons but now that he does...

it's just too sad?

but especially when Rin says all of that and still...]

I'm just... not certain I'm someone who should have something like that. It's really... too selfish. [there's a bit of a pause before he laughs. in a helpless manner.] I'm just this selfish sort of person who doesn't know what they are, runs from duty, and causes chaos wherever I go.

[if it sounds like he's echoing something he's heard, it's because he is. and he can't really refute it, either.]

Allen...

[It does sound like he's repeating someone else's words, because Rin does that sometimes too. And he doesn't know who told Allen all of that, but he really wants to find them and kick their ass right now.]

You know, that sounds like all the stuff a demon does. Being selfish, causing chaos, that sorta thing. Hell, I do those things all the time.

[He reaches over to take Allen's right hand, sliding his fingers between Allen's to interlock them, should Allen not stop the contact.]

So who cares if it's selfish? You're allowed to be selfish sometimes. And shit, if you have trouble with it, then I'll be the selfish one for the both of us. I want to be with you for as long as I can, and I'll say that as many times as you need to hear it. And then a hundred more.

[Rin, no. Tyki Mikk is not for you to fight? it would end bad?

but Allen doesn't stop the contact, he just grips onto Rin's hand.]

I... can't. I can't. Being so selfish... is how I made Mana into an akuma. Being like this--I try not to because I'd just. Hurt someone. In the end.

[thaaat last part doesn't have much to do with the whole akuma thing. it's older. far more traumatic in its own way, feeding into everything else. but he also can't talk about it. couldn't possibly approach is closer than he's getting here.

not wrong in assuming he has "trouble" with it.]

[He will fight Tyki Mikk just watch. He's going to defeat Satan someday, so Tyki is just a roadblock along the way.]

Hurting yourself still counts as hurting someone, you know.

[Because he Knows. He knows what it's like to hold back because you're afraid of hurting someone you care about. He's done exactly the same thing before. Luckily he got lectured hard about it and is trying to not do that shit anymore, but it sounds like Allen needs that lecture.]

I've survived things that no person should be able to survive. I've had my foot cut off and had to feel it grow back. I've nearly burnt myself out trying to defeat demons the size of a mountain. I've had people I trusted betray me, and friends try to break our friendship 'for my own good'. I got turned into a human pincushion by like 20 sword-wielding rodents. I've been shot in the head and regenerated from that. Twice. I was nearly dragged right to hell by Satan himself.

But none of that compares to watching you put yourself down because you think you don't deserve something you want. That's what hurts, more than anything else.

... I'm sorry.

[said quietly because he said to Akira he didn't want to hurt Rin and he still doesn't even when he's apparently doing that? but also because... he knows. how much a lot of that hurt. knows it intimately well.

no, what really hurts is this is the first time someone has listed out injuries and terrors that actually match up horribly well with his own, though he's had more of those total body breakings than shots in the head.]

[Wow it's almost like they're both protags in shounen manga or something!

But it looks like it's starting to work. Maybe Rin can break through all of those heavy thoughts Allen has. There's a glimmer of hope there, and he has to keep trying to push through.]

If you don't like me, that's one thing. I'd be disappointed, but it would be alright. But don't say 'no' just because you feel like you don't deserve it. No matter what your past is, and no matter how much time you have left, you deserve to be happy. Happiness isn't something you only get by being the 'right kind of person' or whatever. Everyone gets to be happy, regardless of who they are.

Does being together like this- [He squeezes Allen's hand to indicate their closeness right now. It's not just in a private bedroom for private things, but close to each other. Being near each other in general.] -make you happy?

[guess who can't trust his voice anymore because he's also just so starved for affection and physical contact that he just barely manages a hesitant nod that yes, in fact, it does. make him happy?

... he thinks?]

[Okay, that's a good first step. Let's go from there.]

What about...

[He reaches up with his other hand to rest it against the back of Allen's head, spreading his fingers through Allen's hair gently. Then he pulls, trying to bring Allen into a hug of sorts.]

...this?

[rather than actually answering, he lets his left arm go up and around Rin's shoulders. he doesn't really pull him in closer but the intent is certainly there.]

[It's still enough of an answer for Rin. If Allen can't talk, then movements will work.]

I bet I can think of a few more things that'd make you happy too.

[He keeps his hand in Allen's hair, but he's running his fingers through the strands, almost petting Allen's head in a way. And as he does that, he tilts his head a bit so he can plant a kiss on Allen's forehead. Right above his left eye, where the star from his mark is.]

[BOTH OF YOOOOU--!

but he makes a sound that's somewhere between a huff and something more rueful.]

... think I'm not that difficult to please, really.

[just--just saying.]

You're really not. Which is why I like doing it all the time.

[The hugs, the hand-holding, the kisses, that kind of stuff. He is sure he'll enjoy other things too, but they can't do that all the time.

By the way don't mind him, he's just going to plant a few more quick kisses all over Allen's face. Forehead, cheeks, the tip of his nose, and then a longer one on his lips.]

[there is a very clear moment where Allen seems to be fighting with himself, the expected conflict.

but then he's using his left arm to pull Rin in a bit closer as he kisses back, more uncertain and hesitant that previous kisses but no less intent.]

[Rin will take that as a 'yes', then.

But he senses that hesitancy, so he takes this kiss slow, letting the heat build up over time. There's no rush here anyway, because while Rin can be impatient he is also pretty thorough too, at least when it comes to stuff he enjoys doing.

Thankfully he's not completely new to kissing. Bingo night and truth or dare have both given him plenty of chances to try it out, and he thinks he's getting better at it now. And while it's slow, it is definitely a firm kiss, one meant to say 'I'm here, and I'm not going away.' Sorry Allen, you're stuck with him now.

And that hand up in Allen's hair, it's sliding down to the base of his neck, holding him there gently while his fingers loop around the short white hairs there. He likes having his hair played with, so maybe Allen will like it too?]

[Allen is much less accustomed to kissing, but he's thankful for the easing into it. it gives him time to try to sort out his own feelings--by which I mean he gradually starts to lose composure, leaning into the kiss more insistently. needy would probably be more accurate.

it goes back to that almost desperate loneliness and want for affection, leaving him shaken while his mind screams what a bad idea this is sure to be. someone is definitely going to get hurt or, worse, heartbroken in the end.

he only pulls back to get air, Rin's name quick to come to his tongue as he smiles like he wants to cry again.

you know.

the good kind of cry.]

[Rin sees that smile, and he meets it with a fond look. Seeing Allen like this- genuinely happy and not afraid to show it- he loves that. He could watch that all day if given the chance. But it also looks like Allen could use a bit more encouragement, if only to help put those doubts and fears to rest. And luckily, Rin is all too happy to supply that.

He leans in, close enough to kiss Allen again if he wants but he holds back from that for the moment.]

You know, I really like that smile of yours. But you know what else I like about you?

[that question just earns the look of someone who has probably never thought a decent thing about himself in his life--which is to say: utterly baffled.]

... no?

[God, Rin has a long list of stuff to go with here, it's hard to choose what to even start with.]

Your eyes, for one. They're really beautiful, did you know that? Not just the color, though that's nice too! But they're so honest. Whenever you're lying or trying to say you're alright when you're not, it's your eyes that give you away. And I really, really like that.

[He pulls his hand away from Allen's neck and brings it around to the front, resting it gently on Allen's chest.]

I like your heart too. It's so big, did you know that? You care so much for everyone, and I bet you even look out for the jerks and assholes, huh? But that's good, because that's how you are. You care. And I like that about you too.

[said heart is going like a million miles a minute at this point because actually, it's not so great to know he has such an obvious tell? but also... also Rin means it sincerely.

and the thing about him caring even for the jerks and assholes--isn't that something to be scolded for also??? his bafflement just isn't getting cleared up at all, though his cheeks heat with knowing how Rin intends it all.]

I... i-it's not like I don't hold things against jerks and assholes...!

Well of course not, but you still care, right?

[He can feel Allen's heart racing beneath his fingers, and his fond smile is turning into a cheeky grin. He pats Allen's chest gently a couple of times before speaking again.]

This tells me I'm right too. No matter what your face says, your heart won't lie. I guess that means I should touch you more to make sure you're telling the truth, which is good because that's another thing I like about you.

[Rin has his own obvious tells too. Like his tail, which is fwipping about happily. Or the fact that his blush only grows with each compliment he gives Allen.]

[that is very adorable but also oh my god Rin please. Allen is dying?

easiest way to stop a person's mouth from running: kissing them again.]

[Well, kissing is technically touching? So Rin is very okay with this, yes.

He might be laughing into the kiss at first though. Because Allen you are adorable but also very easy to fluster. Rin loves it.

And now he's sneaking his hands around Allen's back and pulling him close during this kiss, a kiss he is going to respond to eagerly, pressing pack firmly and not giving Allen a chance to catch his breath. Time for some more heated kissing!]

[shut up! is basically the message that Allen's hand gets across by going into Rin's hair and tugging at it a bit, just enough that he can feel it but not enough to hurt, really.

the lack of chance to pull back doesn't seem to be a negative point though hopefully Rin also appreciates a few nips and bites to the kiss. Allen's not the best at not being rough when he's heated and a kiss this involved has him distracted enough that his gentleman guise has fallen to the wayside.]

[Oh.

Well.

Rin is finding out very very quickly that he actually likes this roughness, if the loud groan at having his hair tugged is any indication. He freezes for a second there, absolutely mortified that such a simple action drew such a loud noise from him, but then Allen is kissing him and there's biting and fuck he's diving right into that. The brakes are off now, Rin is 100% into this.

Rin was definitely teasing Allen before. Even if he did enjoy the kisses and the holding, he had been at the advantage and had been using it to goad Allen a bit. But now? Rin is just trying to keep up with Allen, hunger and a bit of neediness driving his movements.]

Holy shit-

[He barely gets the words out between kisses, but he has to say something. Rin is a generally noisy person, after all.]

Nope's Peak r2 - Day 5

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject